Genderfluid
A genderfluid individual’s gender shifts over time. Moreover, it may change constantly. For example, a person may wake up a woman, then at some point during the day, they feel like a man. That is why it's always best to ask your genderfluid interlocutors what their gender identity is at that exact moment.
A genderfluid person’s gender may shift randomly or these changes can be something that depends on the circumstances.
For some other genderfluid people, their gender doesn’t shift that often. These identity changes may happen monthly, or even less often. Changes in gender may correlate with the menstrual cycle in women. This is probably caused by how hormone levels rise and fall during the period.
A genderfluid individual’s identity may move between male and female, but not necessarily. It may shift between any gender or multiple genders and none at all.
When a genderfluid person realizes that their gender identity has shifted, they may or may not change their preferred pronouns and their gender presentation. They can have a feminine, masculine, androgynous, or any other gender expression, depending on how they feel.
For some genderfluid people, their gender shifts are purely internal, and they do not want to express them outwardly.
Not all people whose gender is fluid identify as "genderfluid" though. Some of them perceive themselves as genderqueer, some, as multigender, bigender, genderfae, or as any other non-binary identity.
The basics, some history, and interesting facts
It is unclear who coined the term "genderfluid", what we know is that it has been in use since the mid-1990s. In the 1990s-2000s though it was more common for genderfluid individuals to identify themselves as bigender or genderqueer.
Some genderfluid individuals experience gender dysphoria - constantly or at times.
Here you can take a free Gender Dysphoria Test
A small number of genderfluid people want to change their bodies and even have thoughts about medical transition (hormone therapy and/or surgery) for that purpose. However, the vast majority of genderfluid individuals choose not to transition medically. And it's perfectly understandable since any change in their body would feel right to them only for a short period of time - when they feel like they belong to a specific gender, but would start feeling wrong immediately after another gender identity change.
Most genderfluid individuals perceive themselves as the same person all the time, just someone not having the same gender. Some genderfluid people switch between specific personas as they change genders though.
In some people’s opinion, this happens due to Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), which is characterized by dissociation and the existence of alters. One of the most frequent causes of DID is abuse in early childhood. Since gender fluidity is not caused by traumatic abuse, this disorder has nothing to do with being genderfluid.
There are many celebrities who identify themselves as genderfluid. Here are some of them:
Asia Kate Dillon from the USA, known for their roles in the shows Orange Is the New Black (2013) and Billions (2016); Dillon describes themselves as genderfluid and nonbinary.
Ruby Rose is a popular Australian actor who came out as genderfluid in 2014.
Evan Greer is an American songwriter whose identity is genderfluid/genderqueer trans femme.
Flags and symbols
Non-binary internet users created 14 genderfluid flags. The most popular one was made by JJ Poole (aka Lostinthoughtspaceandfantasies) in 2012. It consists of five equally sized horizontal stripes of the following colors (from top to bottom): pink, white, purple, black, and blue.
The pink color represents the feminine, the white symbolizes all genders; the purple color stands for the mix of the masculine and the feminine, the black symbolizes the lack of gender, and the blue stripe represents the masculine.
The most popular and, undoubtedly, the most beautiful genderfluid symbol was designed by Meredith Espinosa. It represents three circles connected with a blue-purple-pink color gradient. The symbol stands for genderfluid individuals’ shifting identities.
Genderfluid and sexual orientation
The difference between gender identity and sexual orientation is the difference between who you are and whom you love/are attracted to. Just like individuals that belong to other gender identities, genderfluid people may be sexually and/or romantically attracted to people of any gender.
What pronouns should be used?
Some genderfluid people prefer the gender-neutral "they/them/theirs" set of pronouns. Some other genderfluid folks may use "ey/em/eir", "xe/xem/xyr", "ze/hir/hirs", or even depending on how they feel on that particular day. The best way to find out what their preferred pronouns are is to ask them this with a smile.
Coming out as genderfluid
Coming out as genderfluid can be scary and stressful, there is no point in trying to pretend otherwise. However, many genderfluid individuals have had really positive coming out experiences; some of them even regret not doing it sooner. You should take your time to consider your personal circumstances when deciding to share your gender identity with others. The number one tip is: come out as a genderfluid only if and when you feel safe.
Here are some more useful tips that hopefully will help you have a safe and successful coming out experience:
- Don't feel pressured to tell everybody that you are genderfluid before you are ready - remember that everyone should come out only when it feels right;
- Before you take this important step, read how celebrities and other notable genderfluid people came out - it will help you reduce anxiety and build confidence;
- Choose someone you trust more than anyone else (a close friend or a sibling) and then eventually tell other people;
- If you have any questions or doubts, call a hotline or seek support from an LGBTQIA+ organization.
How can I support my genderfluid friends, family, coworkers?
Humanity has made huge progress in improving the lives and rights of LGBTQIA+ people. But unfortunately, many genderfluid individuals still face discrimination and bullying. That is why it is so important to show them that they are not alone and stand up for their rights. Here’s what you can do today to support genderfluid people:
- Use the correct pronouns and/or names and encourage everyone around you to do so - this is an important part of your genderfluid friend’s identity;
- It can be hard to understand the struggles genderfluid people face unless you try to listen to them with an open heart, understand their problems, and show them empathy;
- Educate yourself on genderfluid and other LGBTQIA+ terms - there is a multitude of resources that can help you understand the differences between genders and other important concepts;
- Be an ally and show your solidarity by signing equality petitions, donating to an LGBTQIA+ organization, and accompanying your genderfluid relative, friend or coworker to LGBTQIA+ events.