Non-binary gender identity
Non-binary individuals may be genderqueer, genderfluid, or feel like they match any other identity from the full spectrum of gender diversity. Some of them might perceive themselves as lacking gender, meaning they are agender.
You probably didn’t know this but non-binary people fall into the category of transgender individuals. Some non-binary people may disagree with identifying as such since to be transgender was historically defined as a gender identity requiring a transition from one binary gender to the other. Therefore, some non-binary people may not view themselves as transgender.
There is no one right way for a person to express themselves as a non-binary individual. Gender expression is just people’s external display of their gender identity through clothing, grooming, etc. Non-binary people can choose a feminine, a masculine presentation, or present themselves in any other way; their gender expression may change over time, too.
The basics and some history
It’s hard to say when "non-binary" was first used as a term that describes a gender identity or who coined this term. All we know is that it has been in use since the first decade of the 2000s.
Note that even though the term "non-binary" is often considered new, the history of non-binary people is much longer than we think.
It might sound surprising, but non-binary people have existed across cultures and throughout time. The history of the non-binary gender could be probably traced back to the beginning of human civilization itself.
For example, according to some writings from ancient Egypt (2000-1800 BCE), there were three genders: male (tie), female (hemet), and sekhet (sht). Sekhet is normally translated as "eunuch", but in some researchers’ opinion, it might be a simplification of the meaning of this gender identity. Therefore, they believe it was a third gender similar to the modern genderfluid - the state of not being exclusively a female or a male.
During the Bronze Age in the territory of modern India, Pakistan, and Bangladesh, the Hijra (people who identified as beyond male or female) existed. They were even mentioned in the Kama Sutra.
The Scythians were well-known for honoring non-binary people as warriors and priests. These Eurasian nomadic people invented the earliest known hormone therapy in the 7th century BCE, using licorice root as a natural anti-androgen, and female horse urine as a natural estrogen.
Now, let us go back to the more recent history: according to one of the largest surveys of trans adults conducted in the USA in 2015, 35% of the respondents said they would describe their gender as non-binary.
There is a vast majority of non-binary identities. Here are some of the most common ones:
- Agender
- Bigender
- Genderfluid
- Neutrois
- Genderqueer
Common abbreviations
A Tumblr user, vector (revolutionator) came up with "enby" in 2013 as the non-binary equivalent of "boy" or "girl." It made some non-binary individuals question whether it can be also used as a non-binary noun equivalent of "man" or "woman."
The author of a 2018 article for Verywell Mind online platform said that “non-binary” means "someone whose gender identity is neither female nor male, also referred to as NB or enby."
These two abbreviations of non-binary, "enby" and "NB", have become widely used in recent years. But this term still has not been accepted by some segments of the non-binary population. According to the 2020 Gender Census, older non-binary individuals call themselves enbies less often.
Flag and symbol
The flag, from top to bottom, has five horizontal stripes of the following colors: yellow, white, purple, and black. The yellow color represents individuals whose gender is outside of the binary. The white stripe symbolizes those who have all or many genders. The purple color represents people who self-identify as a mix of the binary female and male and/or as individuals fluctuating between them. And, last but not least, the black stripe symbolizes agender people (those who lack gender).
The non-binary symbol is a ring with an asterisk representing the letter "X" on top. It symbolizes the X gender (all non-binary genders).
Non-binary and sexual orientation
Gender identity is separate from sexual orientation. Gender identity is an individual's internal perception of their gender and the words they use to describe themselves, while sexual orientation is the enduring pattern of emotional, romantic, and sexual attraction to others.
Non-binary people may have a variety of sexual orientations, just as people of traditional binary genders do.
What pronouns should be used?
Normally, non-binary people use the "they/them/their" set of pronouns, at least, the majority of them do, because it’s the most common gender-neutral pronoun. Some non-standard pronouns (otherwise referred to as "neopronouns") like "xe", "ze", "sie", "co", and "ey" have also gained popularity lately. In any case, the easiest way to find out what set of pronouns a non-binary individual uses is to politely ask them to share their preferred pronouns while having a conversation with them.
Coming out as non-binary
Coming out is always a process. First, an individual explores, figures out, and accepts their gender identity, then they eventually share it with others or decide to keep it to themselves forever.
Coming out is as a non-binary is a brave and life-changing decision.
This bold move and its consequences can be challenging and complicated but it has one large benefit - a deep sense of inner freedom because there’s nothing to hide anymore.
If you or someone you know have decided to come out as a non-binary, here are some tips on how to do it successfully:
- The first person to come out to must be someone you know is 100% supportive;
- Don’t push yourself - you do not have to come out to everyone at once;
- Be prepared for a negative reaction from some people - it takes some individuals time to adjust to this new information, while some people may never accept it;
- Get all the necessary support - let LGBTQIA+ organizations help you, find a mentor to talk to if you feel you need it.
How can I show my support to non-binary people?
Unfortunately, most countries around the world only recognize the two binary genders as legal, so the global acceptance of non-binary genders is still very low. Non-binary people still face multiple forms of discrimination and inequalities in many contexts.
But things have been slowly changing.
There are many non-binary and LGBTQIA+ organizations, like National Center for Transgender Equality, GLAAD, PFLAG, etc., that fight for non-binary people’s rights.
14 July is International Non-binary People’s Day. It was first celebrated in 2012; it aims at raising awareness worldwide and celebrating the wide range of people who identify as non-binary.
All this is the result of enthusiasts’ hard work. They do their best to make the positive change happen. And you can join them!
Here’s how you can step up as an ally to a non-binary friend, family member, or coworker:
- Accept the fact that even if you do not understand a gender identity, it doesn’t mean it’s not real, so always be respectful and encourage others to do the same;
- Use gender-inclusive language - for example, at a gathering where you think someone non-binary might be present, say “Welcome everyone” instead of “Welcome ladies and gentlemen”;
- Listen to non-binary people with an open mind and heart;
- Check out blogs, films, YouTube channels to find out more about non-binary individuals and the issues they face.