Demigender
Some demigender people may actually perceive themselves as having two, three, or more genders. They may relate to those two or three genders equally or may favor one gender identity over the other one(s).
As for demigender as an umbrella term, it includes several gender identities. Here are some of them:
Demigirl
The term demigirl is used to describe a gender identity where an individual only partly, not fully, perceives themselves as a female.
To learn more about this gender identity, see demigirl.
Demiboy
A demiboy is a person who partly, not wholly, self-identifies as male, regardless of their sex assigned at birth.
To learn more about this gender identity, see demiboy.
Deminonbinary
Deminonbinary (sometimes also called demienby) is a gender identity where an individual partly perceives themselves as non-binary. The other gender they feel connected to may be any gender identity on the gender spectrum. Deminonbinary term is often used as a synonym of the demigender term.
Demifluid
Demifluid (otherwise referred to as demigenderfluid) is the word used to describe a gender identity where an individual’s gender is partly fluid while the other part (s) are static. In other words, one half is always there while the other half constantly shifts between genders. A demifluid individual can have any static gender and any fluid gender on the broad gender spectrum. For instance, one part of a demifluid person’s gender is female and the fluid parts are male and maverique.
Demiflux
Demiflux is is a gender identity for individuals whose gender is partly fluid while the other part (s) is static. It may sound similar to the demifluid identity description; however, demiflux is different from demifluid because the suffix "-flux" means that one of the genders present in this gender identity is neutral. For example, one part of a demiflux individual’s gender is gender-variant while the other part that is shifting is neutrois and female.
Demineutrois
Demineutrois (otherwise referred to as demineutral) is a gender identity where a person partly identifies as a neutrois. People who perceive themselves as demineutrois may or may not self-identify as another gender, besides being partly neutrois (neutral). If a demineutrois individual wasn’t assigned X at birth, they may also identify as transneutral.
Demiagender
Demiagender is the term used to describe a gender identity where an individual partly but not fully, perceives themselves as an agender and partly as another gender/other genders. Anybody can self-identify as a demiagender, no matter what their sex assigned at birth was.
The basics, some history, and interesting facts
The term demigender derives from the word demi (old French "half", "partial") + «gender".
This term emerged in the 2010s.
In August 2010, the user Bad Patient of the Asexual Visibility and Education Network (AVEN)’s website forum wrote a post where they stated that they can relate any word to them if they stick a "demi-" in front of it. And it actually helped them find a term for their gender identity.
In 2018, Washington state started officially allowing "X" gender markers on documents. The law states that "X" means a gender that is not exclusively male or female, including, but not limited to, intersex, agender, amalgagender, androgynous, bigender, demigender.
There are many notable demigender people. For instance, the Irish journalist Kay Cairns’ gender identity is genderqueer demiguy, and the American romance author and journalist Chelsea M. Cameron describes themselves as a queer demigirl.
There are many demigender characters in fiction, too. For example, in School Spirit: An Unlikely Web Series by Daisy Johnston, which is an LGBT adaptation of Noël Coward's comic play Blithe Spirit, the character Charley Condomine is an individual who identifies as a demigender.
Flag
The demigender flag consists of seven horizontal stripes of equal width. The colors, from top to bottom, are the following: dark gray, light gray, light yellow, white, light yellow, light gray, dark gray. The shades of gray stand for the partial sense of gender. The yellow color represents non-binary genders. And the white symbolizes the agender identity.
Demigender and sexual orientation
Gender identity is an individual’s internal sense of their gender. It may or may not align with the sex they were assigned at birth based on characteristics such as chromosomes, hormones, external and internal sexual organs.
Sexual orientation is a part of a person’s conception of themselves that includes their sexual/emotional/romantic attraction to other people. Just like individuals who belong to other gender identities, demigender people can be sexually attracted to a person of any gender.
What pronouns should be used when talking to a demigender?
Some demigender people use the traditional gender-neutral they/them/theirs pronoun set. Some others use neopronouns, such as ve/ver/vis, xe/xem/xyr, per/per/pers, etc. Demigender individuals who partially self-identify as female may prefer she/her/hers, and those who partly identify as male may use he/him/his. The best way to overcome your doubts is to ask your demigender friend what pronouns they prefer with a smile on your face.
Coming out as demigender
There are no set rules for coming out as a demigender. Every story is unique. Oftentimes, one of the most challenging parts of it is not knowing how and where to start. If you are planning to make your gender identity open to the public, here are some valuable tips that will help you on your coming out journey:
- Do some research and read celebrities coming out stories online before planning your own coming out as demigender - your story does not have to be (let us tell you it can never be) exactly like another person’s, but you might find something inspiring;
- Practice and rehearse in front of a mirror what you will say when coming out - even though it might sound a bit silly, it is a really useful tool because it helps you become more confident so that you know your coming out will be done the best way possible;
- People’s reactions will not always be positive, be prepared for that; it is also crucial to make sure you are safe and in case of negative response, not to blame yourself for it;
- Find a strong support group, whether it be a close friend, a supportive relative, or someone from the demigender community - it is an important step that will help you make your coming out process much smoother.
How can I support my demigender friends, family, coworkers?
Humanity has made enormous progress in terms of LGBTQIA+ rights, especially over the past couple of decades. However, demigender people around the world still face various struggles - from bias and prejudice to discrimination, harassment, bullying, and violence. There is a great deal of work still to be done for their equal rights worldwide.
This is why it is of vital importance for demigender and other LGBTQIA+ individuals to have allies, especially amongst people whose gender fits into the binary. Here is what you can do today to show your support to your demigender acquaintances, relatives, coworkers:
- Listen to your demigender friends with an open heart to know what they are talking about when it comes to their gender identity, and even if there is something you do not understand, trust them, respect them, and ask them how you can best support them;
- Educate yourself: it is okay to ask your demigender acquaintance's questions, but think twice before asking something too personal or invasive and do your own research about the history of different gender identities and the issues demigender people face while being open to new ways of understanding gender;
- Do not let anyone get away with hate speech and/or offensive jokes about demigender individuals - if you see that somebody is treating your demigender friend with disrespect, call them out;
- If someone comes out to you as a demigender, ask them for consent before sharing this information with others, and if they are not ready to tell other people as yet, respect their choice.