What is “Coming out”?
There are many versions of the origin of the expression "coming out of the closet". According to some researchers, it is a mixed metaphor because it joins the coming-out party of a debutante with the idiom skeletons in the closet.
Coming out is never a one-off event - often, it is a lifelong journey. And it starts with coming out to oneself. Nobody should ever feel pressure to reveal their identity to people in their life.
Importance of coming out
There is no one-size-fits-all solution that guarantees a painless and smooth coming out. It is an experience that is unique for every LGBTQIA+ person. Sharing one’s identity with others can be scary and liberating at the same time. It can be done in person or via text, email, or a written letter.
Both coming out and staying in the closet (not disclosing one’s gender identity and sexual identity to anyone) can be tremendously stressful for LGBTQIA+ individuals. In some areas of the world like Iraq, Afghanistan, and many other Arab countries, telling someone you are an LGBTQIA+ puts you in physical danger. So, many people whose gender identity and/or sexual orientation do not fit into societal norms in such countries prefer not to come out to stay safe and sound.
In the Western world, it is usually less risky for non-binary and non-heterosexual individuals to reveal their identity to others. However, even in civilized countries, the fight for LGBTQIA+ rights is still very far from over. Some families are hostile and non-supportive, so for young gays, lesbians, transgenders, etc., coming out may mean loss of shelter and/or financial support. That is why even these days, many people prefer to wait until they are in a better situation or never come out.
Numerous studies show though that staying in the closet negatively affects an individual’s self-esteem and leads to anxiety, depression, drug and alcohol abuse, suicidal thoughts. While the main benefits of coming out are closer and more genuine relationships with family and friends, alleviation of the stress of having to hide one’s true identity, and the possibility to connect with other LGBTQIA+ people. So in a safe and welcoming environment, the benefits of coming out definitely outweigh the risks.